I stopped a rape happening last night..

the acid never lies · Post by **the acid never lies** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:41 pm

chester perry wrote:classic line....

"you mean you were raped"

"well, at first"

What show was this from.... I know I've seen it somewhere!

chester perry · Post by **chester perry** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 7:08 pm

the acid never lies wrote:
chester perry wrote:classic line....

"you mean you were raped"

"well, at first"

What show was this from.... I know I've seen it somewhere!

Monty Python The Life Of Brian.

the acid never lies · Post by **the acid never lies** » Thu Sep 17, 2009 7:23 pm

chester perry wrote:
the acid never lies wrote:
chester perry wrote:classic line....

"you mean you were raped"

"well, at first"

What show was this from.... I know I've seen it somewhere!
Monty Python The Life Of Brian.

Ahhhh!!!

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 2:41 pm

...I started laughing at the post title

That kind of attitude gets me in trouble alot..

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 2:45 pm

I have a really long 5 pronged epic story about rape that is just hilarious to me...I would tell it to you guys if you want - but the last time I did I got major hated on by girls..and I am a girl so that sort of put me out there in space..

Is a 100% true story..

nitz · Post by **nitz** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 3:02 pm

miscreant wrote:Yeah - I stayed in.

haha

nitz · Post by **nitz** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 3:04 pm

bright maroon wrote:I have a really long 5 pronged epic story about rape that is just hilarious to me...I would tell it to you guys if you want - but the last time I did I got major hated on by girls..and I am a girl so that sort of put me out there in space..

Is a 100% true story..

oo no please go ahead

ahier · Post by **ahier** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 3:05 pm

bright maroon wrote:I have a really long 5 pronged epic story about rape that is just hilarious to me...I would tell it to you guys if you want - but the last time I did I got major hated on by girls..and I am a girl so that sort of put me out there in space..

Is a 100% true story..

yeah, you may as well tell it now...

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 4:02 pm

Alright I'll tell it...

This story is about a girl named Molly..all names are precise and true in this story... she was a goth sort - had a completely shaved head like Sinead O'Conner - IN FACT..she could be Kanye Wests' girlfriend Amber Rose if she had aged, had a tan, plus expensive sunglasses ...

When I first arrived at college - I stayed in the dorms..and at some point well into the quarter a bunch of us were chilling on the balcony smoking out - and Molly comes through chats a bit and invites us to come watch some experimental films she's got back at her place...we were all just relaxing the afternoon so we were game..

We get to her place and are chilling on and around her bed and she goes - "Hey ..You guys have to see my new dress.." and she goes off into the bathroom and comes back in a skin tight, ankle length completely see through dress - with a thong and no bra - titties plain as day...she does a spin in the center of the room and everyone is just stunned and in complete shock and deafening silence - Our casual day out had just got totally fucked - so I get up and leave immediatly - I was like a rodent escaping...but it was the most hilarious thing - I think I laughed whole way home...I have no idea if the others stayed or left..they were all guys so who knows..

Our dorms have a 24 hour convience store by the front door for students..and Molly worked the register sometimes, work study,..so I would see her all the time - this one day..I went in and there was a bunch of guys circling her register - not surprizing..and when I went to pay I saw that she had on this mini-dress..and that her junk was exposed..at first I was worried for her and was like "MOLLY!!" and was making some sort of - down there/cover up jesture - but then I realized that it was Molly and she was just in the process of dating...

Imagine the horror of a young mans parents..

Next semester - I had moved into an apt. around the block from Mollys' and was passing by one day and I saw another girl I knew from school named Jen, sitting on the front porch - So we chatted a bit and I found out that she was Mollys' roommate - then I asked her what she was doing out on the porch - She hesitated at first but told me that Molly was inside having it off with 3 guys - had put her out on the stoop - she was sort of pissed about having been put out..I was like NAH AH!!! and we spent some time trying to get a peek - she told me that Molly had admitted having sex with over 76 different men before she was 17..

So - a year goes by - I move into a different apt. - and this apt. is cool because it is on the 3rd floor and has a large semicircular roof space off the front so you could crawl out there and have a nap or whatever - but I loved to sit out there and drink tea and enjoy the view..My homophobe. ass friend from high school Dirk - was visiting me for a week and we were out on the stoop - having our tea...and we hear this girls say hey - or something - and we look to our left - and a couple of houses down there is a girl climbing out onto the window ledge - she tells us she is coming over and starts to do some spiderman type crazy shit - shimmying her way across the fascade of the houses and stepping from windowsill to window sill - possibly the most dangerous shit ever...and my friend Dirk whispers to me - "This bitch is crazy" right ...so she lands on the stoop and proceeds to kick it with Dirk..we find out that she had in fact just been released from a psychiatric half-way house.. was a perpetual runaway/drug addict..etc. Dirk was completely entertained with her insanity and the next week we spend time with her off and on...and this one day..we are walking back from lunch - and she is flipping up her skirt, mooning all the cars going by..her name was Carmen..I am not making this up..that was her name.

Carmen thougtht that everyone had sex with everyone else...and that it was normal..She believed that at some point every single person in the world would have sex with every person they knew...We spents some time trying to tell her this wasn't true but she didn't believe us..

So she was my neighbor from a couple doors down - and a liked her about as much as you can like a person who is completely out of control - I would spend time with her - but I also kept a serious amount of distance..One day we were talking and she seemed really upset - and so I asked what was wrong - and she said that one of her really good friends had just been raped walking home from the grocery store - I was, you know concerned and stuff - and then in like a flash of white light and supernatural illumination I saw - and I asked who her friend was and she said Molly....

I busted out laughing - I laughed so hard I couldn't stop - Carmen was mad at me and wanted to know why I thought it was so funny...and I was like "Why is she trying to discriminate now!"

ahier · Post by **ahier** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 4:34 pm

the funniest thing was the incredibly american telling of it.

so, to summarise, there was a sketty girl putting herself about and wearing revealing clothes who got raped?

miscreant · Post by **miscreant** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 4:37 pm

ahier wrote:the funniest thing was the incredibly american telling of it.

so, to summarise, there was a sketty girl putting herself about and wearing revealing clothes who got raped?

Wouldnt stand in court for a minute. As soon as a birds had a couple of drinks shes pretty much voided her i've been raped voucher.

6% of charges end up in convictions.

By those odds my weekends just took a turn for the better...

ahier · Post by **ahier** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 4:40 pm

miscreant wrote:
ahier wrote:the funniest thing was the incredibly american telling of it.

so, to summarise, there was a sketty girl putting herself about and wearing revealing clothes who got raped?

Wouldnt stand in court for a minute. As soon as a birds had a couple of drinks shes pretty much voided her i've been raped voucher.

6% of charges end up in convictions.

By those odds my weekends just took a turn for the better...

had she actually been drinking though?
and dnt get me wrong, im not defending her, im jus struggling to see the hilarity

miscreant · Post by **miscreant** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 5:05 pm

ahier wrote:
miscreant wrote:
ahier wrote:the funniest thing was the incredibly american telling of it.

so, to summarise, there was a sketty girl putting herself about and wearing revealing clothes who got raped?

Wouldnt stand in court for a minute. As soon as a birds had a couple of drinks shes pretty much voided her i've been raped voucher.

6% of charges end up in convictions.

By those odds my weekends just took a turn for the better...

had she actually been drinking though?
and dnt get me wrong, im not defending her, im jus struggling to see the hilarity

Sorry I think I phrased that wrong. I was just mentioning the drinking thing separately, dunno if the baldy slapper had had a few or not.

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 5:12 pm

I'm just thinking - Jesus Christ Molly, Man up...

ahier · Post by **ahier** » Sat Sep 19, 2009 5:24 pm

bright maroon wrote:I'm just thinking - Jesus Christ Molly, Man up...

lol, now thats a defense that could stand in court

DustyBunzzz · Post by **DustyBunzzz** » Mon Sep 21, 2009 9:09 am

bright maroon wrote:I'm just thinking - Jesus Christ Molly, Man up...

Hahahaa man the fuck up

bass hertz · Post by **bass hertz** » Mon Sep 21, 2009 9:46 am

how the fuck did I miss this thread?!?!?

morro_e · Post by **morro_e** » Mon Sep 21, 2009 11:25 am

please tell me what the joke is all about cuz i dont know enough english to get it

magma · Post by **magma** » Mon Sep 21, 2009 11:26 am

ROFL at the original post. I was expecting a story of heroism like everyone else...

bright maroon wrote:"Why is she trying to discriminate now!"

UnROFL at this. I don't see why people can't realise that promiscuity is lots of fun until you're not making a choice about it - just because a girl loves to fuck doesn't mean she has to fuck whenever someone else wants her to. Tbh, I've got a pretty whacked out sense of humour, but you'd be getting the cold shoulder if you told that as a "funny" story around me. I know too many girls (one would be too many, actually) who have been through that shit... I'm kind of surprised you can't see the clear difference... it's all about choice.

Since when does enjoying sex make it ok to be raped?!

kins83 · Post by **kins83** » Mon Sep 21, 2009 11:35 am

Dark

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