http://omegle.com/

[lloydnoise]

loool

sorry this one is so long but it is quite funny

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: huzzah!
Stranger: lvl 7 spell
You: and thusly they did meet witht the highest degree of anonimity
You: upon a room of chat
You: most merily and of course most verily did they set upon the task of conversion
Stranger: where I rested weak and weary
You: ah my sweet duke, what is this that ails you in both the body and the mind?
You: you are weak, i see this, rest yee here for as long as the good knight needs
Stranger: be the quarrells of trying to find a joint.
You: Aha!
You: i have both a joint and a manhattan for thine consumption this eve
You: most verily and of course merily i doth quoff and sup upon thine manhattan
Stranger: a strong draught will do just fine, but thou willst need more than a solitary joint to appease the voracious apetite of mine!
You: 1 shot of thine makers, 1/3 sweet and 2/3 dry vermouth, no more than 4 dashes of finest bitters and the zest of a fine orange
Stranger: motherfucker I need a pint and a half bag!
You: ahh a bun man! mighty deep in his haze of sensemillia doth i catch a glimpse of this weak and pale spectre, he winces twitching for a taste of what i have
Stranger: dude...do you have any weed or not?
You: i offer him a cool pale ale from the Meantime brewery but he is too weak to grip the vessel, leading him in i decant the beverage into a crystal tankard
You: yes i have weed, im getting to that
Stranger: hurry up, sir gawain.
You: he raises his hand in a gesture of acceptance but know as well as him that it is a pointless effort to do so, i bring the vessel to his lips and he sups, slowly at first
You: after his drink is all but finished he turns to me with his ghostly enchanting eyes and brings his frail bony fingers to his cracked blue lips
You: the action repeated only twice is a short pull to and fro the lips, "Aha" i exclaim "it is cannabis you seek!"
Stranger: actually, I'm kinda glad I don't have any weed right now, cause if I did...you'd be killing my buzz.
You: with a swift turn i draw his attention to oak casket aside my woodworks
You: he smiles lifting his expression with a peaceful relief
You: i stand and slowly make my way to the desk, opening the casket i pull a single kingsize silver rizla (slim) and hold it in the air
Stranger: fuckin rice papers.
Stranger: use a ziggy, you dirty hippy!
You: he gasps but before he can say a word i pull a small translucent bag from beneath the velvet lining of the lid of the casket, for a second it glints in the sunlight
You: but mine lord, Rizla are used and smoked across all his majesty's kingdom, it is a doctrine of the highest order!
You: he quietens in his seat and his tired beady eyes follow my movements as i complete my deck
Stranger: then your king be a square!
You: DISSENTER!
You: if not so weak I would have challenged this cad to a dual but i put his quarrelous words down to mild delerium and get on with the task in hand
You: pulling soft strands of golden virginia from the half oz bag i study the man, he appears to be young, short and very thin with a gaunt hung expression
You: his hands rest to his sides and his knees close together
Stranger: lol, young yes. but not short and thin.
You: well he looks it
Stranger: BIG AND BURLY MOTHERFUCKER. I AM THE GREEN KNIGHT, YOU'RE MY BITCH, GAWAIN.
You: i finish laying down the tobacco and proceed to grind all the herb i have
You: oh dear his mind is not of this earth
Stranger: this weed better be not of this earth for all this fucking aroudn.
You: i regret feeding him the ale upon setting him down for he is quite obviously a lightweight
Stranger: the green knight is no green horn.
You: the soft pale chunks tumble from the stone bowl and each catches the setting sun as it falls to the soft bed of tobacco below
You: i turn to the man, "perhaps we should get some food in you before you smoke this, you look most troubled, was it the beer?"
Stranger: do you have any pizzaronis?
You: he shakes his head and points to the cannabis i have just that minute emptied into the plate laid out on the table
You: no i dont
Stranger: cornish hens?
You: at first i cannot make out his words
You: no i have nothing but bread and ale kind sir
You: and some hula hoops
You: but theyre all ready salted now
You: i lean closer and listen again,
You: "gl..aa...ssss w..eee..d"
You: i sit up, "no, it can't be"
Stranger: this better not be crystal meth.
You: he stares deep into my eyes and i know then it is a skank
You: a deep and sinful skank
Stranger: this is getting weird.
You: this weed that i had so trustingly purchased from a travelling gypsy is verily cut with the most poisonous of substances
Stranger: if it's weed, I'll smoke it.
You: i suddenly feel in no mood for company, you must leave. At first he protests in his own weak pathetic way but very quickly realises the anguish and pain that doth run through my very being, his exit is swift and as i move the lock to it's resting place i start to sob, softly at first but as each breath is done a weep more ghastly and peircing than the last fills the room as i slump against the cold oak door
Stranger: I'm not leaving without drugs
You: a knock
Stranger: that better not be the cops.
Stranger: or sherriff, or whatever your medieval times ass is into,
You: I stand and peep through the cracks for a glimpse of the visitor but it is too dark outside, slowly opening the door my eyes adjust to see the very stranger i had but minutes before ejected from mine very hovel
You: no its you, you're not following the story
Stranger: shit man, I just got out of school, I don't want to have to read no stories MOTHERFUCKA
You: i slowly but purposfully slide my hand into my moleskin jacket and removed a small but heavy foil form, catching the dancing firelight it appeared animated, alive
You: i slowly unwrapped the object, peeling the layers of thin alloy metal from the contents inside all the time standing in the doorway facing my new compadre
You: he smelt it first, the warm heady aroma of the soapbar
You: i smiled as his steps carried toward me, his gaze fixed upon the ebony lump betwixt mine finger and thumb
You: i backed away and led him to his chair, tipping the poisonous deck away i laid a new bed of tobacco, thicker than the last and covering much more of the plate
Stranger: HASH
You: yes sweet hash
You: oh it is a glorious day indeed
You: for i had forgotten this folly, this simple stash
You: and oh the laughter we shared as we smoked sweet sweet soapbar into the night reminiscing on the days joys and indeed heartbreaks and as the moon rose a small plume of blue smoked curl up into the trees tracking its arc across the clear spring skies
You: THE END
You: im gonna smoke some weed, see ya
You have disconnected.

[Coppola]

Stranger: can you write anything in polish?
You: no
You: because poland is the land of the weak
Stranger: uu,...
Stranger: and you're from?
You: england the land of the strong
Stranger: yea...
Stranger: you've got there too much poles
Stranger: ha?
You: they are here doing our work
You: they do the jobs that we don't want
You: so its a bonus for us tbh
Stranger: maybe it's truth
Stranger: but not in 100%
You: yes
You: 100%
You: the polish are like our slaves
Stranger: u r fool
Stranger: you loves your fuckin england
You: yes
Stranger: yea i know
You: it is greatest country
Stranger: no
Stranger: it's not
You: easily the most civilised
Stranger: you loves your football rep
Stranger: your luis hamilton
You: they are our saints
Stranger: you think that they're the best
You: name one famous polishman
Stranger: and anyone can't be better
Stranger: Jan Pawel II
You: never heard of him
Stranger: haha
Stranger: no?
You: he sounds boring
Stranger: pope
You: i bet he is gay
Stranger: he was the pope
You: jean paul II?
Stranger: yea
You: i fucking hate catholics
You: bye
Stranger: haha
You have disconnected.

[werd2jah]

loool

sorry this one is so long but it is quite funny

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: huzzah!
Stranger: lvl 7 spell
You: and thusly they did meet witht the highest degree of anonimity
You: upon a room of chat
You: most merily and of course most verily did they set upon the task of conversion
Stranger: where I rested weak and weary
You: ah my sweet duke, what is this that ails you in both the body and the mind?
You: you are weak, i see this, rest yee here for as long as the good knight needs
Stranger: be the quarrells of trying to find a joint.
You: Aha!
You: i have both a joint and a manhattan for thine consumption this eve
You: most verily and of course merily i doth quoff and sup upon thine manhattan
Stranger: a strong draught will do just fine, but thou willst need more than a solitary joint to appease the voracious apetite of mine!
You: 1 shot of thine makers, 1/3 sweet and 2/3 dry vermouth, no more than 4 dashes of finest bitters and the zest of a fine orange
Stranger: motherfucker I need a pint and a half bag!
You: ahh a bun man! mighty deep in his haze of sensemillia doth i catch a glimpse of this weak and pale spectre, he winces twitching for a taste of what i have
Stranger: dude...do you have any weed or not?
You: i offer him a cool pale ale from the Meantime brewery but he is too weak to grip the vessel, leading him in i decant the beverage into a crystal tankard
You: yes i have weed, im getting to that
Stranger: hurry up, sir gawain.
You: he raises his hand in a gesture of acceptance but know as well as him that it is a pointless effort to do so, i bring the vessel to his lips and he sups, slowly at first
You: after his drink is all but finished he turns to me with his ghostly enchanting eyes and brings his frail bony fingers to his cracked blue lips
You: the action repeated only twice is a short pull to and fro the lips, "Aha" i exclaim "it is cannabis you seek!"
Stranger: actually, I'm kinda glad I don't have any weed right now, cause if I did...you'd be killing my buzz.
You: with a swift turn i draw his attention to oak casket aside my woodworks
You: he smiles lifting his expression with a peaceful relief
You: i stand and slowly make my way to the desk, opening the casket i pull a single kingsize silver rizla (slim) and hold it in the air
Stranger: fuckin rice papers.
Stranger: use a ziggy, you dirty hippy!
You: he gasps but before he can say a word i pull a small translucent bag from beneath the velvet lining of the lid of the casket, for a second it glints in the sunlight
You: but mine lord, Rizla are used and smoked across all his majesty's kingdom, it is a doctrine of the highest order!
You: he quietens in his seat and his tired beady eyes follow my movements as i complete my deck
Stranger: then your king be a square!
You: DISSENTER!
You: if not so weak I would have challenged this cad to a dual but i put his quarrelous words down to mild delerium and get on with the task in hand
You: pulling soft strands of golden virginia from the half oz bag i study the man, he appears to be young, short and very thin with a gaunt hung expression
You: his hands rest to his sides and his knees close together
Stranger: lol, young yes. but not short and thin.
You: well he looks it
Stranger: BIG AND BURLY MOTHERFUCKER. I AM THE GREEN KNIGHT, YOU'RE MY BITCH, GAWAIN.
You: i finish laying down the tobacco and proceed to grind all the herb i have
You: oh dear his mind is not of this earth
Stranger: this weed better be not of this earth for all this fucking aroudn.
You: i regret feeding him the ale upon setting him down for he is quite obviously a lightweight
Stranger: the green knight is no green horn.
You: the soft pale chunks tumble from the stone bowl and each catches the setting sun as it falls to the soft bed of tobacco below
You: i turn to the man, "perhaps we should get some food in you before you smoke this, you look most troubled, was it the beer?"
Stranger: do you have any pizzaronis?
You: he shakes his head and points to the cannabis i have just that minute emptied into the plate laid out on the table
You: no i dont
Stranger: cornish hens?
You: at first i cannot make out his words
You: no i have nothing but bread and ale kind sir
You: and some hula hoops
You: but theyre all ready salted now
You: i lean closer and listen again,
You: "gl..aa...ssss w..eee..d"
You: i sit up, "no, it can't be"
Stranger: this better not be crystal meth.
You: he stares deep into my eyes and i know then it is a skank
You: a deep and sinful skank
Stranger: this is getting weird.
You: this weed that i had so trustingly purchased from a travelling gypsy is verily cut with the most poisonous of substances
Stranger: if it's weed, I'll smoke it.
You: i suddenly feel in no mood for company, you must leave. At first he protests in his own weak pathetic way but very quickly realises the anguish and pain that doth run through my very being, his exit is swift and as i move the lock to it's resting place i start to sob, softly at first but as each breath is done a weep more ghastly and peircing than the last fills the room as i slump against the cold oak door
Stranger: I'm not leaving without drugs
You: a knock
Stranger: that better not be the cops.
Stranger: or sherriff, or whatever your medieval times ass is into,
You: I stand and peep through the cracks for a glimpse of the visitor but it is too dark outside, slowly opening the door my eyes adjust to see the very stranger i had but minutes before ejected from mine very hovel
You: no its you, you're not following the story
Stranger: shit man, I just got out of school, I don't want to have to read no stories MOTHERFUCKA
You: i slowly but purposfully slide my hand into my moleskin jacket and removed a small but heavy foil form, catching the dancing firelight it appeared animated, alive
You: i slowly unwrapped the object, peeling the layers of thin alloy metal from the contents inside all the time standing in the doorway facing my new compadre
You: he smelt it first, the warm heady aroma of the soapbar
You: i smiled as his steps carried toward me, his gaze fixed upon the ebony lump betwixt mine finger and thumb
You: i backed away and led him to his chair, tipping the poisonous deck away i laid a new bed of tobacco, thicker than the last and covering much more of the plate
Stranger: HASH
You: yes sweet hash
You: oh it is a glorious day indeed
You: for i had forgotten this folly, this simple stash
You: and oh the laughter we shared as we smoked sweet sweet soapbar into the night reminiscing on the days joys and indeed heartbreaks and as the moon rose a small plume of blue smoked curl up into the trees tracking its arc across the clear spring skies
You: THE END
You: im gonna smoke some weed, see ya
You have disconnected.

by far the best one ive seen! now i feel discouraged to try this, lol, this needs to be animated!!! seriously!!!

[did]

Blood Ninja is the ultimate....

Here are more of them: http://www.bloodninja.org/list.php?verified=true

<bloodninja> Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
<BritneySpears14> Aight.
<bloodninja> Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
<BritneySpears14> I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
<bloodninja> Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
<BritneySpears14> Oh, I like to play dress up.
<bloodninja> Me too baby.
<BritneySpears14> I kiss you softly on your chest.
<bloodninja> I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
<BritneySpears14> Hey...
<bloodninja> I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
<BritneySpears14> Funny I still don't see it.
<bloodninja> I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
<BritneySpears14> You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
<bloodninja> Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
<bloodninja> I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
<BritneySpears14> Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
<bloodninja> Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
<bloodninja> King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
<bloodninja> You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
<bloodninja> Baby?

============================

<bloodninja> Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
<j_gurli3> thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
<bloodninja> A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
<j_gurli3> haha, ok lets go.
<j_gurli3> i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
<bloodninja> I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
<j_gurli3> haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
<j_gurli3> i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
<bloodninja> Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
<j_gurli3> No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
<bloodninja> Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.
<j_gurli3> stop, cmon be serious.
<bloodninja> It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
<bloodninja> I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
<j_gurli3> thats it.
<bloodninja> Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
<bloodninja> Goddam am I hard now.


================================

<BloodNinja> Wanna cyber?
<DirtyKate> K, but don't tell anybody
<DirtyKate> Who are you?
<BloodNinja> I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
<BloodNinja> And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
<DirtyKate> You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
<BloodNinja> Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
<DirtyKate> Haha! OK
<DirtyKate> Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
<BloodNinja> Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
<DirtyKate> I want everything, baby!
<BloodNinja> Is this a delivery?
<DirtyKate> Umm...Yes
<DirtyKate> So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
<BloodNinja> Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
<DirtyKate> **pause**
<DirtyKate> I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
<BloodNinja> You can't hurry good pizza.
<BloodNinja> I'm on my way now though
<DirtyKate> **pause**
<DirtyKate> So you're at my front door now.
<BloodNinja> How did you know?
<BloodNinja> I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
<BloodNinja> Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
<DirtyKate> ooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
<BloodNinja> So you're still in the bathroom?
<DirtyKate> Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
<BloodNinja> I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
<DirtyKate> What the fuck?
<DirtyKate> You perverted piece of shit
<DirtyKate> Fuck


Awesome.

Seriously man, nothing has cracked me up like this did for a long while. pure comic genius. please do some more

[did]

You: alright
Stranger: will you marry me?
You: yes
You: i will
Stranger: i love you
Stranger: well you love me every night for hours and hours?
You: ive been waiting for you to say that for 17 years
You: well
You: i can manage about 2-3 minutes
You: then its just spooning
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: i donno if thats gonna cut it
Stranger:
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[ST100]

Stranger: Drop
You: DJ Elements givin' you the turbo wheely dealy!!!!!
You: all night until 4 AM
You: free jagerbombs for ladies til 12!
Stranger: i'm going to run over your fucking dog
You: ATTENSHUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You: BWAMBWABBWEEBWUP
Stranger: skat man
You: kromestar man
Stranger: korma man
You: get the fuck out of here
Stranger: tikka tikka all on your face
You: I'm waiting for YOU to disconnect,
You: I got all night.
You: I don't have to be anywhere.
You: I have off tomorrow.
Stranger: so do I
You: we can play this game all night, then.
You: the waiting game.
You: I won't fall asleep either, I don't sleep.
Stranger: oh
Stranger: one of those
You: well I'm not human,
You: I'm a cyborg.
Stranger: a mutant
You: no, a cyborg.
You: they're different
You: and I produce robot bass.
You: when I speak.
Stranger: a tune every time
You: I can put it in text form for you
You: ready?
Stranger: i'll brace
You: BwUUUUUM, BWUBWU,BWUMBWUM. BAPBWAPBRAWP.
Stranger: I just soiled mysel
Stranger: f
You: same
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[ST100]

[njoys203]

somehow I got banned mwahaha. anybody got any advice on how to get around this???

[ST100]

You: SUP?
Stranger: shit...you?
You: YOURE POOPING?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: no
Stranger: sorry
You: IS IT LOUD IN HERE?
Stranger: nothing at all
You: OR IS THAT JUST ME?
Stranger: well...you ARE shouting a bit
You: I AM?
You: FUCK
Stranger: i bit
You: 16 BIT
You: 8 BIT
Stranger: lol
Stranger: a tad?
You: IS 8 BIT 16 BITS SON?
Stranger: go with 16
Stranger: son?
You: yeah,
You: is 8 bit 16 bit's son?
You: k
You: bye
Stranger: could be...waiting on the paternity test
You have disconnected.

[sigbowls]

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ******
Stranger: im bored, looking at how to get a free computer at http://traceurl.com/go/624/freelaptop you should check it out
You: what!
Stranger: well, this was fun :/ hope you have a wonderful day. bye
You: cool
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

a new computer would be nice
you cant say n*g*a

[ST100]

Stranger: What the world needs now, is love, sweet love.
You: can I stay in here with you?
Stranger: I prefer my alone time.
You: are you serious right now?
You: are you fucking serious right now?
You: tell me you're fucking serious right now.
You: you serious?
Stranger: I AM 100% SERIOUS 100% OF THE TIME!
You: I love you
Stranger: I do not return your affections
You: Damn, looks like its just you and me hand...
You have disconnected.

[shane]

You: what color are your socks?
Stranger: One's light grey
Stranger: One isn't
You: interesting
You: was this mismatch intentional?
Stranger: Intentional, but unescapable
You: such is life
Stranger: Whatcha wearin'?
You: the outer layer of a bear i skinned last night
You: its rather comfortable but the flies are getting annoying
Stranger: Where's the inside?
You: sold it on craigslist
You: you'd be amazed how fast you can sell bear innards in the internet
Stranger: What a coincidence
Stranger: I'm drinking water
Stranger: Right now!
You: that is a coincidence!
You: are we related?
Stranger: Conjoined since birth
Stranger: Will you marry me?
You: most definitely
You: i had no idea my day would turn out to be so romantic
Stranger: You'll have to pay a dowry
You: thats unfortunate, i've spent the last of my money on a package of goldfish crackers
You: perhaps we can arrange a trade?
You: the barter system was always my favorite system
Stranger: All i need is 4 cows
You: and snes
You: 4 cows eh? i think that can be arranged
You: i'm gonna need a helicopter
You: and some duct tape
Stranger: 490078 ping-pong balls
Stranger: and marmalade
You: well now it is your lucky day
Stranger: lots of marmalade
You: i actually have 490079 ping pong balls and only need one for my new project
You: i was wondering what i was going to do with all the extras
You: the answer is obvious now, fill them with marmalade
Stranger: What color are they
You: a variety actually
You: mostly pink and green
You: but a few yellow and one that glows in a blacklight
Stranger: Then you are useless for my purposes
Stranger: Adew.
You: cheers
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[raposanegra]

hey i was talking with someone on that chat and she said she was 14, I said I was 18 and then a weird message came saying my IP was recorded by the ... somewhat child authorities of USA and blá blá ... and then the "stranger" said it's illegal to speak with minors over the internet... and that they sent the record to the my local authorities ...

Wtf is this real?! I can't speak with people younger than me...?!

the message seemed real but I don't think it can be cuz it makes no sense...

[faust.dtc]

hey i was talking with someone on that chat and she said she was 14, I said I was 18 and then a weird message came saying my IP was recorded by the ... somewhat child authorities of USA and blá blá ... and then the "stranger" said it's illegal to speak with minors over the internet... and that they sent the record to the my local authorities ...

Wtf is this real?! I can't speak with people younger than me...?!

the message seemed real but I don't think it can be cuz it makes no sense...

Nah, dont worry mate, someone is playin a trick on ya. I got a similar message and played along only to find out it was a hoax...

[Coppola]

if it says
"Stranger:...child authorities..."
then someone has just copy and pasted some bullshit.

[the wiggle baron]

ha. Had one go.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: this is the weirdest fucking thing ever
Stranger: totally
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

...i love it already

[Coppola]

Stranger: xzibit is here
You: yo dawg!
Stranger: he heard we like daterape, so he put rohypnol in our rohypnol so we can rape while we rape
You: man
You: xzibit is a fucking genius

this is a tiny bit of a conversation that has lasted about an hour.

[HamCrescendo]

I've said I'm scottish about 3 times and they've disconnected straight afterwards each time.

[dumb]

Hahahahaha! This is soooo great, when u get somebody who's not just swearing all the time and actually plays along:

Stranger: hi r u from DS?
You: dsf?
Stranger: yeah do u work there
Stranger: i want to complain
You: yeah, go ahead
Stranger: i bought a sofa and it gave me a rash
You: ok, where exactly is this rash u talk about?
Stranger: i even complained to Watchdog
You: i'm making notes for my boss
Stranger: on my leg
You: how's it developed?
You: painful?
Stranger: good u tell Mr DSF I want my money back
Stranger: yes very...it burns a lot
You: ok, just lemme know where you'll pick it up
You: i mean wich ds office
Stranger: i can't even walk anymore
Stranger: so how can i pick it up
You: we'll send a wheelchair
Stranger: ok the one in lakeside
You: or someone for amputee
Stranger: only if u pay for my neg leg
Stranger: new leg
You: we'll replace it with anything you like
Stranger: i want a new sofa too
You: a spade? a bazooka? just name it
You: sorry, can't replace your leg with a sofa
Stranger: no i want a prosthetic leg
Stranger: but i want a replacement sofa too
You: lemme chack what we got....
You: we've happen to run out of legs.... is an arm ok?
Stranger: no my arm is ok there is no rash there
You: yeah but wouldn't it be cool to have THREE ARMS?
Stranger: what 3 arms and 1 leg?
You: you can use the first too trying to pull the coach outside and use the extra arm for swingin it relentlessly
Stranger: :/
Stranger: you are changing the subject
Stranger: what about my sofa?
You: yeah we'll send it
Stranger: i want a new one...pink with flowers
You: you can pick it up from the driveway
Stranger: ok wont you bring it inside my house?
You: sorry, not a company policy, if u replace your leg with the prosthetic arm we might consider
Stranger: that is a bad policy...
You: we might tie a rope at one end and u can use your three arms to pull it in
Stranger: i will be talking to my lawyer
You: about?
Stranger: about your policy....what use is three arms...when i will not be able to walk with one leg?
You: you might ask the lawyer about that
Stranger: ok i will do
You: i'm only responsible for the prosthetics, sorry
Stranger: but only the arms it seems...not the legs
You: less walky, more talky then?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: nice talking to you DSF representative
You: imagine, never having to leave the house again
Stranger: i cant anyway...with my injured leg
You: oh right, right
Stranger: i'll be housebound forever with my new pink flowered sofa
Stranger: i look forward to your delivery
You: we'll i think my job here's done, good luck with your pink flowered rash causing sofa then
Stranger: thanks
Stranger: or playing along
You: try hitting the rash section
Stranger: for*
Stranger: yes i will do
Stranger: bye
You: bye!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

[misk]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: where do you live
Stranger: asl?
You: where do you live?
Stranger: US
You: okay
Stranger: and u ?
You: wanna cyber?
Stranger: why ?
You: you know, because im hot, baby
Stranger: hehe
You: i wanna treat you special
Stranger: oh, thanks.
You: i wanna treat you like that chick behind the gas station
You: the one that i hurt
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

AWESOME.