On Sexuality

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 2:08 pm

I pushed up on a guy once and it was really futile and boring - so never again.

I want mature confirmation.

I want a statement of intent.

Everyone - bust out the fancy pens.

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 2:22 pm

You wanna be my what?

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 2:26 pm

noam · Post by **noam** » Fri May 20, 2011 3:03 pm

particle-jim wrote:
leebass wrote:
particle-jim wrote:
kay wrote:I'd like to throw out something that might be from a slightly different viewpoint. It bears on the subject of "Ooo boobies!" and "Look at the tits on that!". Frankly speaking, I generally don't talk about women in that way. In fact, I'm downright uncomfortable doing so, and being in the presence of people who do that non-stop. My interest is more on personality and the whole package, rather than specific body parts.

However, this generally leads me to being labelled as "uninterested". One of my oldest friends once described me as asexual. For the record, I'm neither.

This then brings up two things:
1) The impression I get from the male demographic is that I'm slightly odd. Not gay, just odd.
2) The impression I get from the female demographic is that they don't really know what to do about me. Typically, I get assigned to Friend Zone faster than you Usain Bolt can run.

What then does this say about sexuality? There are arguments against objectivisation, but does some degree of objectivisation need to be present for something to happen? How much of sexuality is based on conditioning, and how much is based on hardwired reflexes/impulses?
This sounds a lot like me
Makes me wonder if I would do better with women if I was some obnoxious "oi oi, get yer tits aaat" sex pest rather than a quiet and shy individual who is very uncomfortable talking about that sort of thing... I probably would to be honest, but the sort of women who would respond positively to that kind of behaviour wouldn't really be the sort of women I'd be interested in, the sort of women I'd be interested in would probably be just as quiet and shy as myself but then how will either of us initiate anything if we are both uncomfortable talking about it?
It's almost like I'm purpose built to dwell in the friend zone
You don't have to be obnoxious to let a girl know you're interested.
Ask her out to do something just the two of you. Joke around and tease her.
And if you're both shy it makes the situation so much more easier, cos you're speaking to someone on the same wavelength as you. That's what i find anyway.
meh, to much effort, i'll just do what i always do... get lucky by accident and then be totally unsure as to how i actually managed it

be real mate, its not too much effort... its that you're pretty scared! lol

trust, least if you're honest bout stuff like that which is embarrassing you can make a joke out of it and its easier to get past

yes speaking from experience!

wub · Post by **wub** » Fri May 20, 2011 3:07 pm

bright maroon wrote:I pushed up on a guy once and it was really futile and boring - so never again.

?

particle-jim · Post by **particle-jim** » Fri May 20, 2011 3:16 pm

noam wrote:be real mate, its not too much effort... its that you're pretty scared! lol

true

kay · Post by **kay** » Fri May 20, 2011 6:09 pm

wolf89 wrote:Ignore my post I was drunk and being silly

kay · Post by **kay** » Fri May 20, 2011 6:10 pm

particle-jim wrote:This sounds a lot like me
Makes me wonder if I would do better with women if I was some obnoxious "oi oi, get yer tits aaat" sex pest rather than a quiet and shy individual who is very uncomfortable talking about that sort of thing... I probably would to be honest, but the sort of women who would respond positively to that kind of behaviour wouldn't really be the sort of women I'd be interested in, the sort of women I'd be interested in would probably be just as quiet and shy as myself but then how will either of us initiate anything if we are both uncomfortable talking about it?
It's almost like I'm purpose built to dwell in the friend zone

We're all doomed

kingGhost · Post by **kingGhost** » Fri May 20, 2011 7:16 pm

bright maroon wrote:<iframe src="/forum/video.php?url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4D2qcbu26gs" frameborder="0" style="overflow:hidden; height:auto; max-width:540px"></iframe>

BIG. i was actually trying to remember the name and artist of this song because it was stuck in my head the other day.

kingGhost · Post by **kingGhost** » Fri May 20, 2011 7:23 pm

most women like a guy who is strong and confident. unfortunately our society teaches us that to be that way you have to be an obnoxious alpha male. completely untrue. a lot of guys take this to the extreme, just like a lot of wimpy guys take being wimpy to the extreme. that's why a lot of women don't go for "nice guys" because they're wanting someone masculine, confident, and strong... and all they see is the two extremes. which one do you think they'll go for? find the happy medium. this isn't to say that some women aren't fooled by the alpha male act... because that's what it is, an act and a front for a wounded man.

i mean think about it. if you're shy, reclusive, not confident... what does that say about you as a mate? if you get married, life gets hard (and it will), will you be the one they can look to for support and leadership?

wubstep · Post by **wubstep** » Fri May 20, 2011 7:30 pm

I has those Kay attributes, spot on.

Waiting for a train today in the station bar, sit opposite some chick who is reasonable, within my parameters. We exchange glances, a few more glances. Fairly obvious we're both somewhat interested. She has to leave for her train, gives me a blatent smile whilst passing. Feel like a douche for not initiating.

Get on my train 5 mins later, she's sat there. Walk right past her for a reason still unbeknown to me. Neither of us had the fucking balls to get up and sit next to the other. Totally would have got laid.

kingGhost · Post by **kingGhost** » Fri May 20, 2011 7:54 pm

and on not dressing like you're "asking for it." any non-idiot knows a woman is never asking to get raped.

but you can sure curb a lot of objectification of yourself if you don't have bare cleavage showing. women dressing like that is just like a man who acts "alpha." desperate cry for attention on the heels of not wanting to feel insignificant. do you really go to the store, try on a "sexy" outfit and think "wow this really makes me feel empowered and respected as a human being."? or are you thinking about what your potential next sexual partner is going to see?

nowaysj · Post by **nowaysj** » Fri May 20, 2011 9:05 pm

Love that this thread has turned into "how to get laid for shy guys!"

3za · Post by **3za** » Fri May 20, 2011 9:18 pm

wolf89 wrote:I wanna fuck constantly.

I am with you on that one Sir (no homo).

nowaysj wrote:Random thoughts and observations: At age 3 my daughter started stripping naked and striking playboyesque poses in the mirror. Where in the motherfucking world did that come from? WHERE?

And I think you Sir need to do a better job of hiding your Playboy stash

garethom · Post by **garethom** » Fri May 20, 2011 9:29 pm

kingGhost wrote:most women like a guy who is strong and confident. unfortunately our society teaches us that to be that way you have to be an obnoxious alpha male. completely untrue. a lot of guys take this to the extreme, just like a lot of wimpy guys take being wimpy to the extreme. that's why a lot of women don't go for "nice guys" because they're wanting someone masculine, confident, and strong... and all they see is the two extremes. which one do you think they'll go for? find the happy medium. this isn't to say that some women aren't fooled by the alpha male act... because that's what it is, an act and a front for a wounded man.

i mean think about it. if you're shy, reclusive, not confident... what does that say about you as a mate? if you get married, life gets hard (and it will), will you be the one they can look to for support and leadership?

Spot on KingGhost. Don't be a pussy and don't be a brash, aggressive arsehole. As you said "find the happy medium".

Although being a pussy does seem to be a VIP pass to girls who wear plain-glass glasses and brogues.

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 9:31 pm

wub wrote:
bright maroon wrote:I pushed up on a guy once and it was really futile and boring - so never again.
?

Ok - So I'll do it again..but knowing that it's futile.

I just can't for the life of me develop a taste for the futile.

Why stress futility when I can just bang myself out and not worry if he's gonna call.

uuuuuooo...

Sex with kids and/or animals? No - check
Hawk luggies in the shower? No - check
Fan of contemporary country music? No - check
Natural selection is the same as selective breeding? No - check
Do you spit shine your shoes manually? No - check

Penchant to futility?

kay · Post by **kay** » Fri May 20, 2011 9:57 pm

wubstep wrote:I has those Kay attributes, spot on.

Waiting for a train today in the station bar, sit opposite some chick who is reasonable, within my parameters. We exchange glances, a few more glances. Fairly obvious we're both somewhat interested. She has to leave for her train, gives me a blatent smile whilst passing. Feel like a douche for not initiating.

Get on my train 5 mins later, she's sat there. Walk right past her for a reason still unbeknown to me. Neither of us had the fucking balls to get up and sit next to the other. Totally would have got laid.

*slap* It's not often that people like us find instant attraction! You'd better hope she turns up for the train again.

To avoid this becoming purely a club hug thing, what are people's thoughts on (non-medically required) breast implants? How does this fit into the objectivisation viewpoint? Are these women objectivisating themselves by doing so? Or is it just a means of expression or preference? Do men actually go for all those penis extension treatments that we all get spammed by? Would this count in the same way as fake boobies?

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 10:04 pm

OH HELL NO!!!

You're not that much of a nerd..prepare to fight

Neptune · Post by **Neptune** » Fri May 20, 2011 10:11 pm

nowaysj wrote:Random thoughts and observations: At age 3 my daughter started stripping naked and striking playboyesque poses in the mirror. Where in the motherfucking world did that come from? WHERE?

I was in Pizza Hut the other day with my friend and her 4 year old sister. A song came on that she liked, so she stood up on the table and proceeded to wine and grind like a pole dancer. I nearly fucking died of laughter. Too funny.

bright maroon · Post by **bright maroon** » Fri May 20, 2011 10:23 pm

On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Re: On Sexuality

Who is online