Jokes thread

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jugo
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by jugo » Mon Jun 27, 2011 8:05 am

why was 6 frightened?



because 7 8 9
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Shum
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Shum » Mon Jun 27, 2011 8:35 am

kier3wiet wrote:Why did the tiger get lost in the jungle?

'cuz jungle is massive
:mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
Last edited by Shum on Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
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lloydnoise
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by lloydnoise » Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:04 am

What do you call a terrorist in Ibiza?


































All Summer Bin Largin'
parson wrote:the way you cure disease with lsd is by manipulating the matrix with your mind

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Re: Jokes thread

Post by wub » Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:13 am

Woman goes to the doctors. She comes home later in floods of tears. "What's wrong?" asks her husband. "The doctor made a lewd comment about me!" sobs the woman, "he said I had a nice fanny!". The husband is furious with this, and storms off to see the doctor. "OI!" the husband says, "what the fuck do you think you're doing telling me wife she's got a nice fanny?!??!!"

The doctor rolls his eyes. "Your wife misunderstood me, sir" he says, "I actually told her she had acute angina."
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nicenice
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by nicenice » Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:18 am

What's blue and smells like red paint.
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clifford_-
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by clifford_- » Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:21 am

nicenice wrote:What's blue and smells like red paint.
blue paint?
Follow me on Twitter- @clifford_i
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noam wrote:son
let me break this down for ya
mustard = yellow
HP = brown
Ketchup = red
if ya fuck with the program, someone's gona get hurt... feel me
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by jiba » Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:28 am

What's green and eats nuts?


Syphilis
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by wub » Wed Jun 29, 2011 6:32 am

A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
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nicenice
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by nicenice » Wed Jun 29, 2011 7:35 am

wub wrote:A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
This reminds me of some ridiculous sex act I heard. You fuck her doggy, with her facing a window. Preferably downstairs. Then you get a friend to stealthily fuck her from behind, without her noticing. You run around to front window and scare her. I think its called the Houdini.
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ahier
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by ahier » Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:37 am

nicenice wrote:
wub wrote:A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
This reminds me of some ridiculous sex act I heard. You fuck her doggy, with her facing a window. Preferably downstairs. Then you get a friend to stealthily fuck her from behind, without her noticing. You run around to front window and scare her. I think its called the Houdini.
to pull this off effectively, surely you'd have to penis profile all your friends to find the one with the best match
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Filthzilla
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Filthzilla » Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:24 am

belalala wrote:really vulgar, sorry.....


what do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?










.......a quarter pounder with cheese :oops:
:oops:

I feel bad for laughing but...

:cornlol:
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by BryceFury » Wed Jun 29, 2011 4:56 pm

nicenice wrote:
wub wrote:A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
This reminds me of some ridiculous sex act I heard. You fuck her doggy, with her facing a window. Preferably downstairs. Then you get a friend to stealthily fuck her from behind, without her noticing. You run around to front window and scare her. I think its called the Houdini.
Similar to the Ninja (from Urbandictionary):

An intense sexual position involving a man and a woman and a dildo, the way it is performed is
first, you turn off all the lighs in the room
second, you start banging the girl in the ass
third, you shove the dildo in her ass and pull out so she "does not know"
fourth, you jump to her side scream NINJA and punch her in the face.
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slothrop
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by slothrop » Wed Jun 29, 2011 5:00 pm

nicenice wrote:
wub wrote:A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
This reminds me of some ridiculous sex act I heard. You fuck her doggy, with her facing a window. Preferably downstairs. Then you get a friend to stealthily fuck her from behind, without her noticing. You run around to front window and scare her. I think its called the Houdini.
That made a lot more sense when I realized that you weren't actually shagging a dog...
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Kochari
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Kochari » Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:31 pm

slothrop wrote:
nicenice wrote:
wub wrote:A new position has been added to the Kama Sutra - "The Bin Laden". You burst into her bedroom and shoot your load in her face.
This reminds me of some ridiculous sex act I heard. You fuck her doggy, with her facing a window. Preferably downstairs. Then you get a friend to stealthily fuck her from behind, without her noticing. You run around to front window and scare her. I think its called the Houdini.
That made a lot more sense when I realized that you weren't actually shagging a dog...
:lol:
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crutch
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by crutch » Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:30 pm

jimmy comes home from school one day and says to his mum, "mum, david did better than me at the maths test today, is it cause im stupid?" to which his mum replies, "no jimmy, its cause your special." so the next day he come home and again asks "mum, jane did better than me at the english essay today, is it cause im stupid or am i special?, to which his mum replies "your special of course." so again jimmy comes home from school and asks his mum, "i was taking a pee today and noticed i have a much bigger penis than all the other boys, is that why im special?" and his mum replies, "no you idiot your special cause your 25 and still in school"
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finji
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by finji » Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:59 am

TSH-Tim wrote:Why did the little girl fall off her swing ?













Because she had no arms............
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#cyber
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Viineri
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Viineri » Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:32 am

finji wrote:
TSH-Tim wrote:Why did the little girl fall off her swing ?













Because she had no arms............
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:cornlol: :cornlol: :cornlol:
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What's funnier than a dead baby?

Post by jrisreal » Thu Jun 30, 2011 10:40 am

http://deadbabyjoke.com/

Take a look, laugh, cry, shriek, etc.
...in my opinion
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soul dead
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Re: What's funnier than a dead baby?

Post by soul dead » Thu Jun 30, 2011 11:27 am

a dead baby which you fathered.
:4:
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gnome
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Re: What's funnier than a dead baby?

Post by gnome » Thu Jun 30, 2011 11:45 am

:sinkingship:
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