Jokes thread

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Gewze
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Re: What's funnier than a dead baby?

Post by Gewze » Thu Jun 30, 2011 11:56 am

What's the difference between a lamp and a dead baby?
It's really easy to turn on a lamp.

ahahha
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say_whut
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by say_whut » Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:28 pm

I remember telling this joke in college, we were in a weird mood the lot of us and were in tears at this

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?

A blender.

How do you get them back out?

Tortilla chips.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by belalala » Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:14 pm

rank.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by wub » Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:28 pm

What's the difference Maddie McCann and my car keys?



My car keys aren't being gang raped in a basement somewhere.
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soul dead
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by soul dead » Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:17 pm

what's the difference between Tony Blair and Maddie McCann?

Tony Blair's parents loved him.
:4:
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by jugo » Thu Jun 30, 2011 6:08 pm

a pedophile and a little girl are walking through a forest at night.
"i'm scared" says the little girl.
"you're scared?" he replies, "i've got to walk back on my own"
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Reamz » Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:29 pm

soul dead wrote:what's the difference between Tony Blair and Maddie McCann?

Tony Blair's parents loved him.
This is the one!
And how will you inquire into a thing when you are wholly ignorant of what it is? Even if you happen to bump right into it, how will you know it is the thing you didn't know?
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by murky21 » Fri Jul 01, 2011 1:14 pm

Saw the psychic last week, she said I'll be coming into money, last night I shagged a girl called penny,, spooky or what !!!
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Electric_Head » Fri Jul 01, 2011 1:19 pm

Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?

The sheep started to get too familiar to the sound of a zipper.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by zerbaman » Fri Jul 01, 2011 3:06 pm

shaunlee0 wrote:Whats green slimey and smells like Kermits fingers?


Mrs. Piggy
Fixed :6:




Surprised this hasn't been said yet. Probably a ridiculously easy one... But here goes:
Q: What's the difference between the Pope and Madeleine McCann?
















































A: The Pope will die a virgin.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by koala » Mon Jul 04, 2011 11:49 am

How does little Billy know, when his sister has her period?



-Dads dick tastes like blood
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by RandoRando » Tue Jul 05, 2011 9:02 am

Why did the little girl drop her cherry ice cream?

































Because she was hit by a bus.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by particle-jim » Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:23 pm

what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by magma » Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:36 pm

particle-jim wrote:what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
Alternatively, if they get the punchline correct...

What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?

The pilot, you fucking racist piece of shit.
Meus equus tuo altior est

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Re: Jokes thread

Post by particle-jim » Tue Jul 05, 2011 1:40 pm

magma wrote:
particle-jim wrote:what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
Alternatively, if they get the punchline correct...

What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?

The pilot, you fucking racist piece of shit.
that was orignally how i told that joke, but then my friend hit me with the 'n*ggas with altitude' line and it was so much funnier
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zerbaman
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by zerbaman » Wed Jul 06, 2011 7:31 pm

magma wrote:
particle-jim wrote:what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
Alternatively, if they get the punchline correct...

What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?

The pilot, you fucking racist piece of shit.
It's a joke thread. Calm down.
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Kochari
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Kochari » Wed Jul 06, 2011 7:50 pm

zerbaman wrote:
magma wrote:
particle-jim wrote:what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
Alternatively, if they get the punchline correct...

What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?

The pilot, you fucking racist piece of shit.
It's a joke thread. Calm down.
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by d-T-r » Wed Jul 06, 2011 8:03 pm

past , present and future walk in to a bar...







It was all a bit tense.






















:t:
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Reamz
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by Reamz » Thu Jul 07, 2011 1:31 am

Kochari wrote:
zerbaman wrote:
magma wrote:
particle-jim wrote:what do you call black guys flying aeroplanes?

n*ggas with altitude
Alternatively, if they get the punchline correct...

What do you call a black guy flying an aeroplane?

The pilot, you fucking racist piece of shit.
It's a joke thread. Calm down.
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:4: :4: :4:
And how will you inquire into a thing when you are wholly ignorant of what it is? Even if you happen to bump right into it, how will you know it is the thing you didn't know?
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64hz
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Re: Jokes thread

Post by 64hz » Thu Jul 07, 2011 10:29 am

d-T-r wrote:past , present and future walk in to a bar...







It was all a bit tense.




:t:

:cornlol: :cornlol: :corndance:
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