Post
					
								by zerbaman » Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:43 am
			
			
			
			
			First off, I'd like to say, I fucking love this thread. This and the "Most disgusting thing..." thread have me in stitches.
Anyway, here's a few bits and bobs from the many schools I've been to since my entry to mainstream education.
At the school I'm at now, on my first day, I walked into the toilet and was walking by the cubicles to go to use the urinals, when I peer in one door and there is shit EVERYWHERE. It's difficult to explain if you weren't there, but it was honestly everywhere, on the walls, the inside of the door, the seat, the flush-bar etc, there were even hand marks all over the place, in the toilet seat there was some paper I'm assuming the culprate used to clean up.
At the school I was at two years ago in Angola, this kid Lanre, he was one of those kids who would do anything you told him to do, I think it was self esteem related as he struggled at making friends, his sister however was best friends with my sister and claimed that when they were little, they had a nanny who "poisoned" him. But the story here was outside of school, when we were on a camping trip for what is the International Baccalaureate Programme's equivalent of the Duke of Edinburgh award. Anyway, me and my best friend at that school ended up sharing a tent with him, there weren't enough tents or something, and he went out at night. We woke the next morning to screams as the tent of the 'fit' girls beside us found, what was confirmed by a teacher as, traces of semen on the outer shell of their tent and on their cooking materials.
Before that, I went to this all boy's Catholic school in North West London, this place was full of creeps. I recall this one kid, think his name was Callum? He was alleged to have been the leader in a set of shittings. The first was one of three placed outside the cubicles in the toilet. Then a year later, after I'd left, I was notified by a friend in his year, that there had been another anonymous shitting, onto the stage from the overlying balcony during a whole school assembly.
There was this kid at the same school, called Alessandro, he was in my form, pretty lame kid; always trying to be hard, always telling stories about his grandad who was some mafioso back in Italy, during our graffiti phase, telling us shit like he used to paint trains, that his brother was head of TDO (a popular graffiti crew in the area), that he had "says" (authority to select new members) in IOM (another crew comprising 18 to 30 year olds)... You get the idea
So one day, we were standing in the 'playground' at school when one of the older graffers and a few of his mates came up looking for him, they robbed him for lunch money and his phone. Later they return with the majority of their year group, again looking for him, when they tell us that on his phone, they found several videos of him tossing himself off. He comes up with a new story, that he'd lent his phone to a stranger who had made the video...
A few years ago, he reckoned he was a club promoter, and booked me to play at a night he was running, after haggling me down to 50 quid for the full night, I turn up and NOBODY shows up. Same thing happened to him years earlier at his birthday party, but that time 2 or 3 people went, and left when he started crying about it.
There was another Callum in my year, who wanked off his dog, apparently he swallowed cum too. He also got caught masturbating in English, more than once. Same kid ran away from home once and then went back 2 hours later because he was hungry. I hear he's a raging alcoholic these days, which may sound weird given our age, but that kid has always been resourceful with getting his and other people's fixes sorted out, probably looks old as fuck now anyway.
At the same school, there was this dude Gregory, one of the 'rudeboys' of my year-group, couldn't be seen with people our age, always with older kids, and most importantly a strong homophobic. Once on a school trip, there was a scream from the back of the bus, we looked at the back of the bus, only to find him, groping a kid from my form, telling him to stay quiet and whispering bookey shit to him, softly too. I saw him a few weeks before I moved stateside, it was raining and he was walking around in a fish-net tank top and mangy flip flops. I have word that he's now dealing crack and heroin.
In my last primary school, there was an autistic boy. He tried to force me to start a 'pop band' with him, and stole my pencils and yu-gi-oh cards when I refused.
At my first, there was this kid who shat his pants and hid his soiled undergarments in the classroom for a week.
The cousin I'm living with now used to be best friends (their parents are still pretty close so he still visits us) with this kid who threatened to blow up their school, as a joke, then became this super religious (apparently as a coping-mechanism for the emotional traumas) nut who regularly tells us we're going to hell.
I suppose these are specifically weird things, but there was a lot more to tell if I consider the straight up disgusting or violent things that happened at schools I've been to.
			
			
									
									Do you say 
zerbaman? Or do you say 
zebraman?
Soundcloud