Awful or Pompous Band Self-Descriptions

[rickyarbino]

May have gone a bit far with the pics, but fuck him lol

[exfox]

wow

[rockonin]

MY OFFICAL WEBSITE IS http://WWW.CHEENABLACK.COM
FOLLOW ME I WILL REPOST YOUR MUSIC

From the comment section lolol

Cheena its Art Drizzle Energy from a sound cloud crush I have , anyway when you get a chance I wrote a song inspired by you.The name is my imaginary date, but ah I could text it all on there,

AWWWWWWWWW REALLY I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR IT WHEN U RECORD IT

Art Drizzle Energy lol Dafuq

[Direflow]

he's been newly signed to Mala's Deep Medi label, perhaps the most revered seal of approval in true-skool Dubstep circles.

With a sound that is perpetually nostalgic, yet equally refreshing, and heavy enough to shock the toughest of sound systems, _______’s music displays a binary relationship between ‘Foundation Sound’ homage and Forward-Motion thought. Spacious textures, heavily built sub-frequencies and intricate execution of minimalism are but a few significant ways in which his music can be described.

fill in the blank

this is commodo right

[dickman69]

this is a guy on the radio site im on...

James Dussey lives a normal life. He goes to the store to buy groceries. He goes to the gym to boost his endorphins. He goes to his job where he works an honest shift. He goes, He goes… But what does he listen to? He listens to normal music, of course. Normal music for a normal diet; a normal gym session; a normal commute. Normal.
But around 11 pm, something happens…
He keeps it a secret. He tells nobody. The music – It isn’t normal. In fact, a normal person would be instantaneously turned off, sick, confused, and alienated the moment they glanced into the nocturnal realm of James Dussey. Inflatable love dolls covered in goats blood. Hippie midgets somersaulting into oblivion. Anorexic ballerinas dancing on origami.
This music caters to freaks – freaks like you…
Now James Dussey has broke out of his shell and wants to share his playlist with you. Don’t be alarmed because this music is as embraceable as it is different. Inhale – force, feel, power, color… Experiment – execution, repetition… Exhale – ideas, emotions, compose, create… Join James on Cosmic Radio, Tuesdays at 11 pm, as he explores the breadth of unfamiliarity.
Nothing is normal. Nothing is strange…

i couldnt listen to his show for more than 15 minutes

[Pedro Sánchez]

But around 11 pm, something happens…
He keeps it a secret. He tells nobody.

Non consensual anal?

[wub]

But around 11 pm, something happens…
He keeps it a secret. He tells nobody.

He's a fan of tranny anal creampies.

[Pedro Sánchez]

But around 11 pm, something happens…
He keeps it a secret. He tells nobody.

He's a fan of tranny anal creampies.

Who isn't

[wub]

Rob Ford.

[Pedro Sánchez]

He is really, political power and a reacharounds go hand-in-hand. He just doesn't like the cleanup job after the fun.

[wub]

[+]

[rickyarbino]

He's a moron, and she looks like a tranny tbf.
If you're into that fair play, but his haircut suggests otherwise.

[Direflow]

he's been newly signed to Mala's Deep Medi label, perhaps the most revered seal of approval in true-skool Dubstep circles.

With a sound that is perpetually nostalgic, yet equally refreshing, and heavy enough to shock the toughest of sound systems, _______’s music displays a binary relationship between ‘Foundation Sound’ homage and Forward-Motion thought. Spacious textures, heavily built sub-frequencies and intricate execution of minimalism are but a few significant ways in which his music can be described.

fill in the blank

this is commodo right

oh no this is compa
makes sense

[exfox]

"
With ‘-----‘, ------‘s deliberate placement of sounds open an auditory field that not only creates an impression of space, but contracts and expands with a blend of glitch and guitar motifs over deep rhythms and warm undertones. A truly three-dimensional sound that brings to mind a radio broadcast from a sinking submarine. Bubbles rise up though the murky water and break at the surface, as the craft disappears into the deep. Once or twice, the sounds threaten of something more sinister, but never takes you there. The effect is to draw you further in… and lead you into the untapped regions of your subconscious, all the while maintaining an addictive underlying beat that never fails you."

[therapist]

"
With ‘-----‘, ------‘s deliberate placement of sounds open an auditory field that not only creates an impression of space, but contracts and expands with a blend of glitch and guitar motifs over deep rhythms and warm undertones. A truly three-dimensional sound that brings to mind a radio broadcast from a sinking submarine. Bubbles rise up though the murky water and break at the surface, as the craft disappears into the deep. Once or twice, the sounds threaten of something more sinister, but never takes you there. The effect is to draw you further in… and lead you into the untapped regions of your subconscious, all the while maintaining an addictive underlying beat that never fails you."

That has to be one of the worst (best?) so far.

[ehbes]

"
With ‘-----‘, ------‘s deliberate placement of sounds open an auditory field that not only creates an impression of space, but contracts and expands with a blend of glitch and guitar motifs over deep rhythms and warm undertones. A truly three-dimensional sound that brings to mind a radio broadcast from a sinking submarine. Bubbles rise up though the murky water and break at the surface, as the craft disappears into the deep. Once or twice, the sounds threaten of something more sinister, but never takes you there. The effect is to draw you further in… and lead you into the untapped regions of your subconscious, all the while maintaining an addictive underlying beat that never fails you."

??

[SignalRecon]

DJ Steem, 53 followers, spams me a link to vote for his BS prog trance remix on one of those shitty contest sites that spams your entire facebook/twitter and scrapes all of your data/friend's public data... I ask him for a link to the tune so i can decide if i want to vote or not (instead of just fucking ignoring his tnuc ass?) and he decides this is grounds for him to be a condescending prick who thinks im being ridiculous for asking and that he's doing me a favor linking his soundcloud.

Got to his Soundcloud to find a bio in the 3rd person by the 1st person, with an emphasis on him creating "his own sound" -Prog. House. Fuck you Steem, sincerely.

Steem, a name brought to attention, when hearing electronic music. Born and raised in Toronto. The Portuguese producer/DJ has made some noise, though the industry and has caught great attention. At the age of 15, Steem began his journey by spinning over the internet airwaves, on live streaming sites. When reaching the age of 20, Steem started to produce with Diemonte, he learned the ropes of producing music, and decided to create his own type of sound. Steem joined the roster for MHM LIVE and Embrace, which has lead him to perform at big venues such as The Hoxton and Maison Mercer, where he opened for some iconic artists such as: Danny Avila and Borgeous.

In the beginning of 2014, Steem's first release "Up In Your Head" arrived onto Beatport and iTunes. Steem is continuously working in the studio making new releases, which has lead him to be signed to three labels: Substream (Sweden), 6N7 Music (Canada) and Protoxic Records (France). Developing a fan base, Steem stays connected with fans through social media such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Soundcloud. Follow this rising star as he wows his audience, with every track he brings to our speakers. Steem dedicates his time, and energy in what he loves to do. Producing and proceeding towards his goals to show the world his passion for music, that connects us as one large community with no judgments. #TeamSteem

[_ronzlo_]

"Progressive House" and "Progressive Trance" are both gigantic oxymorons. How do you progress a style defined by severe limitations?

Steem, a name brought to attention, when hearing electronic music. Born and raised in Toronto. The Portuguese producer/DJ has made some noise, though the industry and has caught great attention.

English, is not so. Good.

---

DJ Steem sure is cool looking doe. Damm. I wish I could be this cool.









I likez his interweb pagey-home too.

http://www.djsteem.com/


OOONNTSSS-OOONNTSSS-OOONNTSSS-OOONNTSSS MOTHERFUCKERS.

[SignalRecon]

"Progressive House" and "Progressive Trance" are both gigantic oxymorons. How do you progress a style defined by severe limitations?

lol... also "Made noise and caught great attention" // 53 Followers. GG.

[Harkat]

lol I never understand people with elaborate internet brands that are neither big nor make good music.

The only way I could ever be fucked to "promote" myself is to send tunes to DJs I like or know personally. If the tunes are good they're good, and if not, whatever.

Yet I get these people following me on twitter who have laughably amateurish tunes, like literally just the cheapest 4x4 kick with 2 LFOed square wave notes on it with zero extra smoothening, white noise, builds etc. Like the shit you see in GD people's sigs. Yet despite that they have a shiny EDM logo, every type of social media account/soundcloud, their tunes are on spotify, masturbatory bios (like those in this thread) and so on. They just follow people en masse on social media in hopes of attracting attention.

Where's the enjoyment in that, honestly?