The SNH Football thread

[RKM]

yeah i would have liked him at AFC tbf

same

would have improved our ratio of soggy yutes : jokes mentalists

[wub]

Presumably some of that 90k a week he can put towards buying Lambert a nice comfy cushion.

[scspkr99]

yeah I don't see Lambert starting much unfortunately I like the lad

[hubb]

I'm the most excited about Joel Campbell tbh though there's a long way.

[Muncey]

Welbeck told he can leave but not for any of the top 6 in the Prem. So Spurs then.. he can't move to Spurs, cause no fucker else in the top 6 would have him.

[scspkr99]

If Liverpool had Wellbeck I'd be fucking delighted if we could shift him to a top 6 team

[Johoosh]

35m on Andy fucking Carroll.

Are we all agreed that this is the biggest transfer guff of all time then?

[scspkr99]

So I'm a Liverpool fan which in the hypocritical traditions of football support means I can say it but I must disagree with you if you say it.

I think that's how it works, in any case possibly though it would have been bigger had Allardyce not thrown 20m at us for him.

[Riddles]

Taken off reddit about Balotelli:

CAR CRASH (August 2010): Just days after signing for Manchester City, Mario Balotelli hits the headlines after crashing his Audi R8 en route to the club's training ground. Balotelli is found to be carrying 5,000 pounds in cash at the time of the accident and when police ask why, he reportedly replies: "Because I am rich.''
WOMEN'S PRISON (October 2010): Balotelli, sidelined after knee surgery, is questioned by police after driving his Mercedes into the grounds of Brescia women's prison.
FIRST MAN CITY RED CARD (November 2010): Balotelli scores his first Premier League goals in a 2-0 win at West Brom but the achievement is marred when he sees red following a clash with Youssuf Mulumbu.
WILSHERE SNUB (December 2010): City boss Roberto Mancini says Balotelli must change his attitude following his claims he had never heard of Jack Wilshere after beating the Arsenal midfielder to FIFA's young player of the year award.
DART-THROWING INCIDENT (March 2011): Balotelli again hits trouble after it emerges he threw a dart at a City youth-team player. No one was hurt in the incident and he escapes punishment.
SECOND RED CARD (March 2011): Balotelli apologises to his teammates after he is sent off during a Europa League tie with Dynamo Kiev for a reckless challenge on Goran Popov.
BACK-HEEL BLUNDER (July 2011): Balotelli is immediately substituted by an enraged Mancini after performing a pirouette and back-heeling wide when clean through on goal in a preseason friendly against the Los Angeles Galaxy.
FIREWORK INCIDENT (October 2011): The Italian has another run-in with the emergency services after a firework is set off in the bathroom of his home, triggering a fire. The next day, he scores in the Manchester derby and celebrates by revealing a T-shirt that reads: "Why always me?''
THIRD RED CARD (November 2011): The third red card of Balotelli's City career arrives in a league match against Liverpool, the 21-year-old dismissed for two yellow cards.
BREAKING CURFEW (December 2011): Balotelli breaks a club 48-hour curfew by visiting a curry house ahead of a match against Chelsea.
RICHARDS CLASH (December 2011): Just days after Balotelli's curfew lapse, he again attracts negative headlines after pictures emerge of a training-ground bust-up with teammate Micah Richards.
PARKER CLASH (January 2012): Balotelli was charged with violent conduct by the FA, and subsequently handed a four-match ban, after appearing to stamp on the head of Tottenham's Scott Parker during a Premier League match.
INTER NEWS CONFERENCE (March 2012): Balotelli gatecrashes the news conference to announce the arrival of Andrea Stramaccioni as Inter's new coach.
FOURTH RED CARD (April 2012): Balotelli sees red for two bookable challenges on Arsenal full-back Bacary Sagna. Also guilty of a shocking first-half knee-high challenge on Gunners midfielder Alex Song.
FIGHT WITH MANCINI (January 2013): Balotelli clashes with the Manchester City manager in training after refusing to leave the pitch following a lunge on Scott Sinclair. He is sold to AC Milan weeks later.
SMOKING AND ARGUING (April 2013): After being caught smoking a cigarette on a train carrying Milan's squad to a game versus Fiorentina, Balotelli is hit with a three-game suspension for arguing with match officials following a 2-2 draw. Italy coach Cesare Prandelli says the striker must "learn to shut up."
SENT OFF FOR ITALY (June 2013): Two yellow cards in three minutes see Balotelli sent off in a World Cup qualifier versus the Czech Republic.
MISSED PENALTY AND ANOTHER RED (September 2013): After missing the first penalty of his career, Balotelli is sent off at the end of Milan's defeat versus Napoli for arguing with the referee.
CRYING ON THE BENCH (February 2014): With his side trailing at Napoli, Balotelli responds to his 73rd-minute substitution by appearing to break down in tears on the bench.
CLASHES WITH TV PUNDITS (April 2014): After he was substituted during a defeat versus Roma, Balotelli told critical analysts "you don't understand anything about football. Trust me, you really don't."
POSES WITH GUN (July 2014): Balotelli posts (and subsequently deletes) a picture on social media showing him pointing a gun at the camera with the accompanying message "a big kiss to all the haters."

[Muncey]

WOMEN'S PRISON (October 2010): Balotelli, sidelined after knee surgery, is questioned by police after driving his Mercedes into the grounds of Brescia women's prison.

[hubb]

Brescia is a really hard place btw. It might be that the citys women are exclusively located in the prison tbf. They don't even speak Italian there.
Cassano is the citys prince and he prides himself with not being understood by other people on the national team. But Balotelli speaks 'brescian' or whatever it is, and that's one of the reasons they always tried to pair the two together.


Also the thing about Carroll is his alcoholism you shouldn't buy into the way the press has been dealing with him imo. he had it it all for a short while and every other English player is too expensive , he's just the scapegoat and he has a disease.

[wub]

Alcoholism isn't a disease

[hubb]

Well, then an inherited non capability towards splicing the necessary bits in the bloodstream like the rest of us can, leading to various kinds of sickness.

[hubb]

Does disease infer something external ?

Is a sickness more correct or ?

[hubb]

[+] Spoiler

What do you call a ponytail then?

[Muncey]

Alcoholism had nothing to do with it, his drinking was only considered a problem because he ended up in a fight once or twice. He was a 19 year old Geordie, I dunno what people expected from him. Certainly wouldn't have effected his career, I bet most players drink.. just probably not in public social places like he was doing.. probably bottles of stupidly priced wine pretending to "understand art".

Saying he has a disease or is sick because he had a couple hangovers in his late teens in training is a ridiculous statement.. 99% of Newcastle have a hangover on any given day.

It wasn't the fact he was drinking it was the fact he was a Prem footballer probably drinking in a weatherspoons so hes painted as having a problem

[scspkr99]

I think his biggest problem is that he's not very good at football.

[hubb]

I'm not entirely convinced that he wasn't and there was even talk of a heroin addiction tbh..
He's looked spectacularly ill for someone just having a few.
His dip in form would also suggest it.


But he played like a drunk aswell so tbf that might have tipped it over.
And my point was to not listen to the claims soooo Maybe I did.

[scspkr99]

yeah you're probably right it was the smack

[Muncey]

Who hasn't looked like utter shite on a Saturday morning in their late teens?

I didn't say he had a few I just meant he drank like any normal teenager, I bet he actually drank way below the average of most teens in Newcastle lol. Compare him in the circles of millionaire sports athletes and yeah its easy to say he has/had a problem, compare him to a regular 18/19/20 year old and hes a pussy.

Still to this day I get myself into states where I can't even bring myself to watch football, let alone play at a Premier league standard.

He is just a piss poor footballer.