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Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 9:43 pm
by Kamex
Why Cant Madeline McCann play PlayStation..
Because i have xbox.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 9:57 pm
by TSH-Tim
Kamex wrote:Why Cant Madeline McCann play PlayStation..
Because i have xbox.
PMSL PSML PSML !!!!!!!!
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 9:57 pm
by TSH-Tim
How sick are we allowed to go
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:24 pm
by AntlionUK
My rule on comedy is either everything can be taken the piss out of or nothing can.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 10:38 pm
by dubloke
I thought I made this joke up but was then told that it already existed
Why did the peanut have a black eye?
because he was a-salted.....
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 4:31 am
by Atac
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 5:17 am
by Motorway to Roswell
What do you do after raping a blind, deaf and dumb girl?
Break her fingers so she can't tell anyone.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 5:18 am
by Motorway to Roswell
How do you know if a girl is too fat to take out in public?
When fucking her means rolling her in flour and boning the wet spot.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 5:33 am
by upstateface
^ Winner
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 2:56 pm
by shaunlee0
Whats green slimey and smells like Mrs.Piggy
Kermits fingers
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 2:57 pm
by shaunlee0
how many babies does it take to paint a room?
Depends how hard your throw them!
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Feb 28, 2011 3:03 pm
by Motorway to Roswell
“Little Johnny is a most shy and insecure boy and is taken to the Circus. Made to sit right in the front by his Auntie, and on come the Clowns. Immediately one runs to him and, thrusting a microphone under his nose says “Are you the front end of an Ass?” “No” says Johnny. “Are you the back end of an Ass” “No” he replies. “Then I declare that you are no-end of an Ass” says the Clown triumphantly. Little Johnny runs straight home in tears. His Mum says you must confront your fears to exorcise them from you forever and sends the poor boy back to the Circus the next day, only this time with Uncle Jim who is a master of the quick quip and witty repartie... “Watch your Uncle and learn” says Mum.
Next day and poor Johnny is back in the front row, but this time with Uncle Jim master of the quick quip and witty repartie. Enter the Clowns, who this time make for Uncle Jim (master of the quick quip and witty repartie). “Are you the front end of an Ass” they ask Jim, a master of the quick quip and witty repartie. “No” “Are you the back end of an Ass” “No” says Jim, a master of the quick quip and witty repartie. “Then I declare that you are no end of an Ass”... But before the audience could react, Uncle Jim, a master of the quick quip and witty repartie, quick as a flash said “...Fuck off you red nosed, big shoed tnuc”.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 2:23 am
by esfandyar
How many brosteppers does it take to clean a bathtub?
100. 1 to clean the bathtub, and the other 99 to comment on how "filthy" the tub is.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 2:26 am
by ruckus49
^^
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 3:29 am
by belalala
really vulgar, sorry.....
what do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
.......a quarter pounder with cheese
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 3:30 am
by Shum
^ gold.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 3:50 am
by esfandyar
belalala wrote:really vulgar, sorry.....
what do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
.......a quarter pounder with cheese
Registering that one.
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 6:07 am
by kier3wiet
Why did the tiger get lost in the jungle?
'cuz jungle is massive
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 6:15 am
by borrowed
Re: Jokes thread
Posted: Mon Jun 27, 2011 7:22 am
by esfandyar
How do you get a midwesterner to suck yo dick?
Pour ranch all over it.
