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Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:52 am
by defoxster
These piss me off no end... Its a basic need to wash your hands & you can do it for free monday to thursday!

Saying that though the guy at DMZ that used to go mad if people went in the cubicle shouting "NO SHITTING IN MY TOILETS" was funny.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:53 am
by LA_Boxers
No CK no BJ.
No soap no hope.
No wash no nosh.
No gum no pum.
Clean your fingers for the mingers.
Get some aftershave to misbehave
No Issy no Kissy.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 9:54 am
by wub
defoxster wrote:Saying that though the guy at DMZ that used to go mad if people went in the cubicle shouting "NO SHITTING IN MY TOILETS" was funny.

It's a brave man who takes a shit at Mass. Dragon Stout is a harsh mistress.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:36 am
by jaydot
I wonder what aftershave the gunfingerer from the DMA's was wearing.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:37 am
by jaydot
:mrgreen:

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 10:52 am
by jameshk
wub wrote:Bollocks to the lot of them, overcharging bastards. Prefer the thrill of trying to lift as many chupa chups over the course of the night as I can before they notice.
I also try this, usually ends up in me far too fucked getting baited and yelled at.

"I thought they where free I sware!"

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:10 am
by magma
I don't understand why they suddenly started springing up everywhere. I grew up under the impression that if cash was going to change hands for someone watching me piss, it'd be ME getting the money. :x

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:12 am
by Forum
Why the fuck would anyone go for a shit in a club?
Almost as bad as the people who do it at work

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:15 am
by wub
southstar wrote:Why the fuck would anyone go for a shit in a club?
It's not something I set out to do, it's just sometimes needs must.
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:16 am
by magma
wub wrote:
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.
Shitting at work is one of life's great pleasures... southstar hasn't LIVED.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:17 am
by particle-jim
wub wrote:
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.
:Q:

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:23 am
by Forum
magma wrote:
wub wrote:
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.
Shitting at work is one of life's great pleasures... southstar hasn't LIVED.
Theres only 8 people work in my office, would be pretty obvious who done it. Pretty quiet in here as well so everyone would probably hear the splashback

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:29 am
by magma
southstar wrote:
magma wrote:
wub wrote:
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.
Shitting at work is one of life's great pleasures... southstar hasn't LIVED.
Theres only 8 people work in my office, would be pretty obvious who done it. Pretty quiet in hear as well so everyone would probably hear the splashback
I used to work in a basement office with 3 other blokes and 2 girls... from what we could work out, the girls pretty much never used theirs. We had two magazine subscriptions for ours... :4:

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:30 am
by Gewze
southstar wrote:
magma wrote:
wub wrote:
southstar wrote:Almost as bad as the people who do it at work
Because a) I get paid to shit at work b) it's 15mins of quality me time and c) I save a fortune on toilet paper.
Shitting at work is one of life's great pleasures... southstar hasn't LIVED.
Theres only 8 people work in my office, would be pretty obvious who done it. Pretty quiet in hear as well so everyone would probably hear the splashback
and?

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 11:54 am
by clifford_-
theres some misguided souls in this thread!

you only give em a pound if you want some aftershave, not everytime they hand you a bit of paper towell! haha

and shitting in a club is sometimes unavoidable. so when your really desperate, try and make it at the start of the night, theyre normally not too bad then.

shitting at work is a must.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:12 pm
by LA_Boxers
clifford_- wrote:theres some misguided souls in this thread!

you only give em a pound if you want some aftershave, not everytime they hand you a bit of paper towell! haha

and shitting in a club is sometimes unavoidable. so when your really desperate, try and make it at the start of the night, theyre normally not too bad then.

shitting at work is a must.
All of this!!!

Fuck paying to wash your hands. You only pay if you get stuff. Usually a spray and a chewing gum for a quid is fair.

Defo about shitting as soon as you get into a club. 100% need to make sure theres bog roll tho......and lots of it.


Work poo is defo the one too. Paid to poo?? I think so. I get in roughly 30 minutes of toilet breaks a day. Not just for pooing. I usually just wee and fb.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:23 pm
by O Tumma Tum Ladin
I've come close to assaulting a toilet attendant before no cheryl cole no george michael

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:42 pm
by garethom
clifford_- wrote: and shitting in a club is sometimes unavoidable. so when your really desperate, try and make it at the start of the night, theyre normally not too bad then.

shitting at work is a must.
Shitting in the club (at the start of a night, I'd just go home if I thought anybody had used the cubicles haha :lol: ) was one of the most exhilarating and terrifying experiences of my life. Sat in a bass trap of a toilet, having a shit, listening to the chavs talking about fighting outside whilst I curl off the most foul turd ever.

Regards shitting at work. I'm gonna be there for at least 8 hours, I'm not sitting there for hours, papping off little pre-turd farts until I can go home and shit.

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 12:50 pm
by magma
LA_Boxers wrote:Work poo is defo the one too. Paid to poo?? I think so. I get in roughly 30 minutes of toilet breaks a day. Not just for pooing. I usually just wee and fb.
I can't find ANYTHING to confirm, but the toilets in this building have pretty much zero mobile phone coverage whereas the rest of the building is fine... I'm convinced there's some shenanigans going on to stop this phenomenon!

Luckily, I have plenty of offline entertainment on my phone too... good 20 minutes with a crossword earlier! :lol:

Re: UK toilet attendents appreciation thread

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 1:28 pm
by leyenda
This has pretty much turned into the work poo appreciation thread.

:Q: