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Hope you guys can critique and follow. I will return the same! Thanks guys!

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The drums are waaay too low in the mix. From what I can hear of 'em, the snare sounds like a big low end mess... Not sure though, can't really hear it haha.

Try correcting the levels first

The composition sounds incredibly random. xD
Especially in the beginning.

Agreed with Koen about the percussion as well. You've got a great idea going, it's just not quite there yet. Keep it up!